WHEN I rule the world, all so-called celebrities will be forced to wear orange vests bearing the slogan “over-paid and unimportant” as a mark of public shame.

WHEN I rule the world, all so-called celebrities will be forced to wear orange vests bearing the slogan “over-paid and unimportant” as a mark of public shame.

Until that day arrives I shall just have to take solace in events like North Walsham's switch-on last Saturday.

Instead of someone deemed to be a VIP solely because their face occasionally appears on our screens, the town's elders opted for seven-year-old Bethany Pardon to do the honours - and didn't she do well (as someone whose face appears frequently on our screens would say)?

Bethany's granddad Michael bought her the chance to switch-on the lights by bidding the top sum in a charity raffle at Trunch.

She quickly lost her initial rabbit-frightened in-the-headlights look of terror after first facing the crowds gathered around the Market Cross.

Helped by the gentle questioning of MC Chris Peck, Bethany was soon chatting away and telling us all about the Hannah Montana toys she hopes will be in Santa's sack, and sounding suitably disgusted when Chris asked if she had a boyfriend.

She went on to list a few names of those who had come along to watch. “Are they your best friends?” Chris asked.

“No, they're not,” said Bethany, firmly.

Who needs weather babes or football heroes when you can enjoy the likes of Bethany, her Christmas list and her second-best friends?